Sunday, January 4, 2009

Bring It

I changed my license plates this weekend. I will spare you the post about the 2 1/2 hours of my life I spent at the DMV that I'll never get back. The point is, I transferred my plates back to Wisconsin and I put them on all by myself. Now that may sound pretty lame to most of you, but it sure felt good to me!

X stuck me with a surprise debt of $600 this month, but I put my big girl britches on and called up the creditors. With a few phone calls I was able to reduce, extend and work out some payments; a major accomplishment for Turtle ol' me, who used to think not opening the mail would make it go away. Yeah, crawling into my shell never helped, so I'm kicking it to the curb.

I had an interview for a job and was turned down (didn't have the required college degree), but I feel good about it; considering it a practice run for my next interview. Plus, God has a plan!

My children are having less nightmares by the night, Praise The Lord! X gets them for visitation next weekend, so we'll see how that affects them, but for right now, they're all happily sleeping around me as I type this. We're all settling in well; we're so blessed to be here.

Amazing how a new license plate, a couple paid bills and a job interview can make me feel like a capable human being again. In the words of Britney Spears, "I'm a smart person... what the hell was I thinking?" I can't name the day I gave into X, the day I stopped being me and started being who I was told to be, but I can darn well name the day I came back.

I'm not the naive girl I went in as. In fact I'm admittedly more cynical, but not overly. I am earning my degree from the University of Hard Knocks, but I guarantee it will take me far. I'm the first to say I've made mistakes. Big, painful, lasting ones... but I won't make the same ones again.

Bring It,


seriously? said...

For lack of better words...YOU GO GIRL!!! Without those "big, painful, lasting" can't enjoy the accomplishments as much.

Blessed said...

oh yes I've had some of those "what was I thinking" realizations too...

Keep going - God will help you through!

SuperAunt said...

Proud of you!!!! Keep up the great work. Remember one thing, He will not fail you, but He may make you wait in line like the DMV to get to your issues, but he will quietly answer you. Give your problems, thoughts, fears and prayers to God at night, and let Him deal with them while you sleep, He's up anyway.

3 Bay B Chicks said...

Just when I think there can't be more ways that we are similar, bam, you hit me with another one...Britney Spears anyone? Had I known you were a fellow fan, I would have included her latest CD in the Christmas package. :)

Passed along a bit of bloggy love to you today...

I know that you are a private blog now, and even if you are unable to play, it is fun to be able to give you a Friends Award!


Patrice said...

Way to put those big girl britches on!! You go girl!!

Sara@ Butterville said...

Look at you! That's right you can DO it. There were times I was a turtle too. Those shells weren't even stylish! Who needs em! Now that your "blocked" I don't get updates for when you if I's because I'm not seeing a new post on my dashboard. I think that's what happened with mine, I was sitting there thinking "their not coming."
Then I took the block off and must were like "THERE you are! Where've ya been?"
I've been here, in Butterville, why didn't you come find me! I gave ya'll the address.
I'm not caring about Sneaky Stacey anymore. I'll see her if she comes poking around, then I'm gonna go right up to her and say
"Stace, do you read my blog? What do you think? Good reading huh?"
For sure I will! Now, can you show me how you hike up them britches??

Sara@ Butterville said...

Oh, and I could use spittin' lessons too!

Annette said...

Hi Carolynn,

Yes we are expected to make mistakes in our lives because we are human... but the glory is we learn from them and God will see us through!!!

Isn't He great????

Congrats on the license plates by the way. That is a big step...keep takin them!!!

Katalyst said...

You never cease to amaze me darlin'! Learning to do things on your own is a scary thing, but the pride you get from knowing that what you have accomplished and the life you have is YOURS is worth it's weight in gold. I'm proud of ya sistah!

minnesotamom said...

I am so proud of you, Carolynn. Your freedom has already got you trusting God at a whole new level. I pray that your fresh beginning can be used to bring new closeness to Him and to bring Him glory! Keep your chin up, too--one summer I applied for 70 jobs before I found one that was the right fit.

Growin' with it! said...

each time you write a post it is more and more empowering...for me as well. i always wanna say "you go girl" at the top of my lungs. thank you carolynn for including us on this journey as we all watch the hand of God restore you and help you soar!

The Berni Family said...

WAY TO GO!!! So gald that you are getting settled in. Give me a call next time you are in town so that I can introduce you to Jimmy!! All the company is gone now and it just the Berni 4 now...visitors welcome anytime!!!!